This just in…..

Hi All,

Your MDP is BACK !

This is not a  post about learning a heap of thought provoking lessons, this is a FULL ON rant, about BLOODY MEN!

So, you remember Milk Tray? Fabulous first date? Well we have (in the last 4 months) have had many more fabulous second, third, fifth, eighth dates (you get the picture!) !

We even went on a mini break to a well known European country. That starts with the letter P and ends in ortugal! Yes we have spooned and forked and stayed at each others. We have got blind drunk and even had an argument (RELATIONSHIP GOALS).

But alas, we were not destined to be.

The arsehole ‘dumped’ me very unceremoniously via Whatsapp (Jan Koum, Brian Acton thanks for inventing such a shitty app). The message was lengthy and lawyer-like (yes that is what he is paid to do 5 days a week). Some of his choice phrases included ‘you aren’t my ex’ and ‘I don’t like cats, LOL’ (FUCK YOU!!!!). At this point, ladies, we learn a lesson, never trust a man who doesn’t like animals! 

So yeah, the long and the short of it is, I fell head over heels in lust with a total arse who is such a pussy that he dumped me via Whatsapp… WHATSAPP!?!?! (still feeling aggrieved).

Being a true MDP, I cried (a lot), I mourned the loss of the perfect embryonic relationship we had started to form and took some photos of myself…. for my brand spanking new Tinder profile. Yes ladies, I am well and truly back in the game!

Your MDP xxx

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